Rated "P" for profanity

You will have to excuse my language for this post because I don't think any symbols would do me any justice. I need real words.

I'm sure I've mentioned the "Free ride zone," before... Where all the crazies hop on the bus for a few blocks? This is where the majority of these weird bussing stories come from.

One day last week I was waiting to get on the bus when a crackhead cut me in line grumbling about "Those crazy mother fuckers on the corner." And when I say crackhead...I mean it. I'm not just using it to be dramatic. This man's eyes were crossed so closely that you could basically just see the whites(reds) of his eyes.

I always sit in the front of the bus because it's a pain in the butt to wait for everyone to unload off the bus AND so that if something illegal or inappropriate happened, I would be close to the driver. For those of you who don't have public transportation experience you may think I'm exaggerating the "illegal and inappropriate," occurrences but oh yes, they happen.

Back to the crackhead... he apparently had the same seat preference as me, so I ended up sitting across from him. He was talking all sorts of nonsense and while I looked straight ahead,
I couldn't help but notice him doing something out of the corner of my eye. Because he was SO sketchy, I glanced over to make sure he wasn't whipping out drugs or a gun (seems to be an awful trend lately) but he was just struggling to put his backpack on (probably because his eyes were so crossed). I looked back to the road when he shot me a nasty look and said "Oh the little bitch has to check and see what I'm doing. You fucking little bitch."

This is where I wish I wasn't so immature and could keep a straight face. But what did I do? Start chuckling. That awful laugh you get in church as a kid (ok.. Still happens to me) where you know you're supposed to be quiet and NOT make a scene. This of course just pissed him off even more and as he got off the bus he just kept repeating "fucking little bitch."

I told this story to my cousin, who is a bussing newbie... (oops, sorry savvy... The bus really is awesome) and she asked "Holy shit! Was it the scariest thing of your life?" It was surprisingly not that scary. I may be out of shape for my race this weekend, but I'm pretty confident I could outrun the cross-eyed crack head.

Speaking of which, what was I thinking signing up for a half marathon for my birthday? Worst present ever. But I'll have two of my best friends running with me and have my mom there at the finish line! Maybe 26 won't be so bad after all :)